Tag Archives: top model

Pulling my eye out with a fork

I am well aware there is far worse medical conditions than a handicapped right eye.

But this is starting to get on my nervs. It is quite disturbing to study when your right side is constantly blurry.
That side of the face will get wrinkles…crap.

Thursday meant revisit to the hot eye doctor.

She quickly concluded that I was not responding to treatment and the parasite family were still chilling out on my cornea, and they had more kids. This fact has decreased my sight remarkably over the last couple of days. Little fuckers! I bet it is a family similar to “pip-Larsson”, which was a Swedish tv series about a gypsy family sent on SVT in 1999, if you remember?. I get the feeling they are moving around heaps, which the pip-Larsson family also did, since they lived in a trailer selling pots.

pip_larsson_kastrullresan

The test results confirmed that it is a case of the rare parasite. The doctor tried to hide her excitement, I’m the first case she ever had with this type. I tried to hide my disappointment, this is the first case of parasite I ever had too. Or no, I had one when i was about 5 years old, from eating snow. As a kid, eating brown snow from a ditch is something you do upset your parents. Karma hit me straight away..

Well, I have now participated in Singapore’s next eye top model. They wanted to take photos of my cornea with a massive Cannon camera. I would not have made it far in such an eye model competition. They had to call in extra staff to force my eye open because I instinctively closed it when the light hit the cornea.

Eyera Banks (sorry, once getting started with the eye jokes I just can’t stop…) was not satisfied and we reshoot 4 times. I cried a river or two, it was so painful! If my eye was drunk last week it definitely felt like it tried some stronger “playing with the mind”-drug this time. I saw colored dots when closing my eyes for hours after.

Will ask for the pictures of my short and un-glamorous career as an eye-model next week.

The hot doctor put me on oral antibiotics for two weeks and on Wednesday I’m going back to scrape the pip-Larsson family of my cornea. She told me I need to be prepared that it will be painful… why would she say that now? I’m going to ask for morfin.

When picking up my antibiotics I started laughing and crying at the same time.

This is a very large amount of medicine for one eye…

IMG_0712

It cost me 426 dollars…

Being an eye-model has not been paying of so far… I would not recommend it.

Peace Out

//Eyetard

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